The TOP 10 Best, Most Greatest, Marvel Comics / Superheroes EVER Of All The Times!!!

-Not my opinions... This is cold, HARD fact.  

These are simply the best Marvel Comics / Characters that have EVER been produced!!!

You can disagree- but you'd just be wrong. 









...and a loser!

So, let's get it started with-
#10.) The Illuminator

Marvel comics and Thomas Nelson Publishers got together to produce this little gem of a comic about a Christian superhero!  I, personally, LOVE being preached at by a comic book!  Jesus is awesome.
                     
Andrew "Andy" Prentiss is just a young high-school outcast who gains wonderful powers one night in the woods at summer-camp when a strange light in the sky suddenly surrounds him- thus making him: The Illuminator!

 Not long after that he meets Gus- the custodian of a local church, and old biker.  Believing Andy has received his powers from God; Gus gives Andy his old motorcycle helmet and jacket, and helps lead Andy to Biblical truths as he deals with peer pressure, and battles demon-possessed drug dealers!


-LIKE A NUKE FROM HEAVEN!!!
 
(Lasted for three prestige-format issues.)



#9.) Solarman
               -I just talked about him the other day...

Dorky teenager; Benjamin Tucker dreams of becoming an artist for Marvel Comics, but his Dad wants him to be a stupid jock. His Mom is dead.
A drunk alien crash-lands on Earth, the best fucking planet ever, and gives him the Circlet of Power! 

Clouds permitting- he becomes Solarman!  And with the help of Beepie; the coolest robot ever, he defeats the evil Warlord Commander Gormagga Kraal!

(Lasted for just two issues.)

Some people like to hate on Solarman- but he got a cartoon where he fought Daleks, so suck it!:

"THE CIRCLET!  THE CIRCLET!!!"

#8.) Meteor Man

Yeah, based off that Robert Townsend movie we all saw a million fucking times back in the early nineties...
(I saw it in theaters three times, myself. It was at the $1.50 theater- give me a break!)

Jefferson Reed is a mild-mannered school teacher in a neighborhood terrorized by a local gang called the Golden Lords. He tries to rescue a woman from the gang one night, but ends up hiding in a dumpster like a coward...  But then- as he climbs out of it, he is struck by a glowing green meteorite!  He awakens several days later, miraculously healed, and has been granted superhuman abilities!  Like super-strength, flight, and being able to touch a book and absorb its contents to use for 30 seconds! 

He has even teamed up with Spider-Man, and Night Thrasher ("Because, of course Night Trasher!" says Dwayne McDuffie as he spins in his grave.)

(Lasted for six issues, and a special.)

 #7.) Nikki Doyle: Wild Thing

-Because virtual reality is SO cool, you guys...  Has VR.5 and VR Troopers taught us nothing of the 90's?

Nikki enters virtual reality games and even cyberspace itself; in order to destroy a virtual drug more addictive than heroin! She even battled Venom, and Carnage... but, like- not really... they were fake V.R. versions... 

Plus, I mean- come on- she is SO sexy!: 

 -Right?

(Lasted for seven issues... oh, really? -That's the cover that got it canceled??? Don't know why... it's so good!)

#6.) NFL SuperPro:

-I said that already.

How awesome is football, right?  GO SPORTS!!!

Phil Grayfield's pro-football career ended tragically due to a non-football related injury. A mysterious sports collector, who also happened to be a scientist, then shows him his "greatest achievement": the SuperPro armor! Later an accident involving experimental chemicals, a fire, melting football souvenirs, the SuperPro suit, and Phil- results in NFL Superpro's creation!
He uses his new amazing abilities to fight crime and defend the sport he loves from forces that would seek to corrupt it! -By doing a lot of punting, and throwing, and tackling of villains like Quick Kick, and Instant Replay!
He has even teamed up with both Spider-Man, and Captain America!

"I beat up a guy called SuperPro last week. Silliest looking guy..."
-Stilt Man

(Lasted for twelve issues, and a Special.)


#5.) Combo Man

I love me some Combos (no- really!) and you know I love comics!!!  So- combining them is, obviously, a great idea!

Rick Wilder was a normal dumb student who happened across a running A.I.M super-device and dropped his comics and ate a Combo all at the same time. -This transformed him into Combo Man! He then defeated A.I.M., and Super-Adaptoid! 

Combo-Man has the powers and abilities of a dozen heroes and villains, including: Spider-Man, Captain America, Hulk, Iron Man, Punisher, Wolverine, Cyclops, Magneto, Dr. Doom, Human Torch, Silver Surfer, Gambit, Carnage, and Daredevil.

(Was only a one issue promotional comic.)

-How sure are we that Combo Man wasn't really just Stan Lee?:

#4.) The Orkin Exterminator

'Nuff said, True Believer!!!

(Lasted for one, technically two, issues...)


#3.) Super Hero

Yes, A Superhero! From The Generic Marvel Comic Book #1.

-The exciting story of a super hero and a super villain as only a writer and a penciler could bring to you! And with an inker doing the inking, you KNOW you're in for a treat!


(Lasted for one seriously amazing issue...)






#2.) Onyx

What do you do when you are rappers in post-atomic holocaust New York?

SLAM! Er, I mean- Fight!

Set in the future of... 1999: Sticky Fingaz, Fredro Starr and Sonny Seeza take on evil bootleggers, and aliens in a post-apocalyptic New York City.

And it makes sure to let you guys know that pirating music is WRONG!  And BAD!  There should be a new, stronger word for pirating music- like badwrong, or badong. Yes, downloading music illegally is badong!  
It's STEALING!
I never, EVER download music illegally! 

(Onyx: Fight was a one issue special...)


and...

#1.) Kal-AOL Turner / Micky / Marville

Bill Jemas is an amazing writer- and makes PERFECT sense!  He's fucking enlightening!
-And not pretentious at all!!!

How to even begin to describe this awesome book, that makes SO much logical sense, and taught us all so much about ourselves...  I highly recommend this series.  It it truly a work of high-art on every level!  (Is this too much?  I know, I know- I feel as dirty writing all this as you must reading it.  I also may have soiled myself.)   

*ah*hem* 

 It's just too perfect for words! One issue is SO perfect that it does not even need word-balloons.  Another issue is SO magnificent- it's not even a story!!! Can you believe it?

And it is the very cutting edge of topical humor and comedic cohesion:

 I mean... this comic... this comic is JUST so WONDERFUL.  It's worth a million dollars, for sure!

Marville was created as part of Marvel's U-Decide event, in which fans would decide which of three books would survive. This was the CLEAR winner.  Peter David's Captain Marvel was the absolute WORST!  I definitely do not own every issues of THAT train-wreak of a comic!

(Lasted for, technically, seven issues... we are all so lucky!)


Wow, Mental Organisms... what a list I put together for you to bask in all day long, huh? -Give it up for me!  I'm great! This is a total success! Why, just like the covers to Marville- I'd say this post was:

-Now go read some GOOD comics!