-Not my opinions... This is cold, HARD fact.
These are simply the best Marvel Comics / Characters that have EVER been produced!!!
You can disagree- but you'd just be wrong.
...and a loser!
So, let's get it started with-
#10.) The Illuminator
Marvel comics and Thomas Nelson Publishers got together to produce this little gem of a comic about a Christian superhero! I, personally, LOVE being preached at by a comic book! Jesus is awesome.
Andrew "Andy" Prentiss is just a young high-school outcast who gains wonderful powers one night in the woods at summer-camp when a strange light in the sky suddenly surrounds him- thus making him: The Illuminator!
Not long after that he meets Gus- the custodian of a local church, and old biker. Believing Andy has received his powers from God; Gus gives Andy his old motorcycle helmet and jacket, and helps lead Andy to Biblical truths as he deals with peer pressure, and battles demon-possessed drug dealers!
-LIKE A NUKE FROM HEAVEN!!!
(Lasted for three prestige-format issues.)
-I just talked about him the other day...
Dorky teenager; Benjamin Tucker dreams of becoming an artist for Marvel Comics, but his Dad wants him to be a stupid jock. His Mom is dead.
A drunk alien crash-lands on Earth, the best fucking planet ever, and gives him the Circlet of Power!
Clouds permitting- he becomes Solarman! And with the help of Beepie; the coolest robot ever, he defeats the evil Warlord Commander Gormagga Kraal!
(Lasted for just two issues.)
Some people like to hate on Solarman- but he got a cartoon where he fought Daleks, so suck it!:
"THE CIRCLET! THE CIRCLET!!!"
#8.) Meteor Man
Yeah, based off that Robert Townsend movie we all saw a million fucking times back in the early nineties...
(I saw it in theaters three times, myself. It was at the $1.50 theater- give me a break!)
Jefferson Reed is a mild-mannered school teacher in a neighborhood terrorized by a local gang called the Golden Lords. He tries to rescue a woman from the gang one night, but ends up hiding in a dumpster like a coward... But then- as he climbs out of it, he is struck by a glowing green meteorite! He awakens several days later, miraculously healed, and has been granted superhuman abilities! Like super-strength, flight, and being able to touch a book and absorb its contents to use for 30 seconds!
He has even teamed up with Spider-Man, and Night Thrasher ("Because, of course Night Trasher!" says Dwayne McDuffie as he spins in his grave.)
(Lasted for six issues, and a special.)
#7.) Nikki Doyle: Wild Thing
-Because virtual reality is SO cool, you guys... Has VR.5 and VR Troopers taught us nothing of the 90's?
Nikki enters virtual reality games and even cyberspace itself; in order to destroy a virtual drug more addictive than heroin! She even battled Venom, and Carnage... but, like- not really... they were fake V.R. versions...
Plus, I mean- come on- she is SO sexy!:
(Lasted for seven issues... oh, really? -That's the cover that got it canceled??? Don't know why... it's so good!)
#6.) NFL SuperPro:
-I said that already.
How awesome is football, right? GO SPORTS!!!
Phil Grayfield's pro-football career ended tragically due to a non-football related injury. A mysterious sports collector, who also happened to be a scientist, then shows him his "greatest achievement": the SuperPro armor! Later an accident involving experimental chemicals, a fire, melting football souvenirs, the SuperPro suit, and Phil- results in NFL Superpro's creation!
He uses his new amazing abilities to fight crime and defend the sport he loves from forces that would seek to corrupt it! -By doing a lot of punting, and throwing, and tackling of villains like Quick Kick, and Instant Replay!
He has even teamed up with both Spider-Man, and Captain America!
"I beat up a guy called SuperPro last week. Silliest looking guy..."
(Lasted for twelve issues, and a Special.)
#5.) Combo Man
I love me some Combos (no- really!) and you know I love comics!!! So- combining them is, obviously, a great idea!
Rick Wilder was a normal dumb student who happened across a running A.I.M super-device and dropped his comics and ate a Combo all at the same time. -This transformed him into Combo Man! He then defeated A.I.M., and Super-Adaptoid!
Combo-Man has the powers and abilities of a dozen heroes and villains, including: Spider-Man, Captain America, Hulk, Iron Man, Punisher, Wolverine, Cyclops, Magneto, Dr. Doom, Human Torch, Silver Surfer, Gambit, Carnage, and Daredevil.
(Was only a one issue promotional comic.)
-How sure are we that Combo Man wasn't really just Stan Lee?:
#4.) The Orkin Exterminator
'Nuff said, True Believer!!!
(Lasted for one, technically two, issues...)
#3.) Super Hero
Yes, A Superhero! From The Generic Marvel Comic Book #1.
-The exciting story of a super hero and a super villain as only a writer and a penciler could bring to you! And with an inker doing the inking, you KNOW you're in for a treat!
(Lasted for one seriously amazing issue...)
What do you do when you are rappers in post-atomic holocaust New York?
SLAM! Er, I mean- Fight!
Set in the future of... 1999: Sticky Fingaz, Fredro Starr and Sonny Seeza take on evil bootleggers, and aliens in a post-apocalyptic New York City.
And it makes sure to let you guys know that pirating music is WRONG! And BAD! There should be a new, stronger word for pirating music- like badwrong, or badong. Yes, downloading music illegally is badong!
I never, EVER download music illegally!
(Onyx: Fight was a one issue special...)
#1.) Kal-AOL Turner / Micky / Marville
Bill Jemas is an amazing writer- and makes PERFECT sense! He's fucking enlightening!
-And not pretentious at all!!!
-And not pretentious at all!!!
How to even begin to describe this awesome book, that makes SO much logical sense, and taught us all so much about ourselves... I highly recommend this series. It it truly a work of high-art on every level! (Is this too much? I know, I know- I feel as dirty writing all this as you must reading it. I also may have soiled myself.)
It's just too perfect for words! One issue is SO perfect that it does not even need word-balloons. Another issue is SO magnificent- it's not even a story!!! Can you believe it?
And it is the very cutting edge of topical humor and comedic cohesion:
I mean... this comic... this comic is JUST so WONDERFUL. It's worth a million dollars, for sure!
Marville was created as part of Marvel's U-Decide event, in which fans would decide which of three books would survive. This was the CLEAR winner. Peter David's Captain Marvel was the absolute WORST! I definitely do not own every issues of THAT train-wreak of a comic!
(Lasted for, technically, seven issues... we are all so lucky!)
Wow, Mental Organisms... what a list I put together for you to bask in all day long, huh? -Give it up for me! I'm great! This is a total success! Why, just like the covers to Marville- I'd say this post was:
-Now go read some GOOD comics!