The New Warriors #15

The New Warriors is a great series (then and now), and damn is 1991's issue #15 is a super fun fucking read! I do have most of the run... but this was one I was always missing.  -Can't remember the last time I had this much fun reading an old back-issue!!!

"Don't ever fuckin' call me kid-fucking-Nova again...  seriously. I'm ALL MAN now!"

~Yeah, Nova! -Bust up dat Jungle Fever New Jack City crack house yo... *cough*

 -This whole scene was just...... weird.
I don't want to say racist, but- like; awkward.  I mean, NONE of the crack-house guys could have been white? White people do crack too, you know... And did we really need to have the crack-mom with her crack-babies inside? The contrast of that, what with Nova looking like he does; all bright and ridiculously costumed... the contrast was just...... strange.  I feel like a scene like this would have played better with Night Thrasher... and not because he's black; but because of his character's personal background versus someone like Richard Rider.  But then- maybe the strange juxtaposition was the entire point...

I'm just saying: Where's the Foolkiller when you need the man? He'd take care of this shit easy!

(Hahaha! No one will get the reference, but read the ten-issue, 1990 Foolkiller series- especially issue #6.  Shit is fucked up! I love that comic.)
But, yeah; Nova just gets freaked out and runs away.  Shit got too real for li'l Richie!

"Uhhh, no? -They are my... pajamas?  -Obviously.  
Fuck... my parents are fuckin' dumb."

By the way- Psionex are AWESOME!:

What a great "Anti-New Warriors" team to be their foil!

"Yeah, Pretty Persuasions wouldn't stop... uh... fucking everyone.  No complaints, though.  It's pretty much the best rape ever!  -Says everyone she's technically raped."

Wait...  What's up with the shirt, Mathemanic:

-Because Vanilla Ice is the shit!:

Speedall- stop interrupting Namorita's bath by... prank-calling her...... modem?  Dafaq, 1991???

 "I always answer the phone butt-nekkid... such is the way of Atlantis!" Well, then- it's a good thing that wasn't Speedball on some kind of video-"modem-call" then! You know how much that guy loves boobs!  -As much as Nova likes to curse.  And I know that technology existed in The Marvel U at this point- just look at the Avengers two-way-video communication/membership cards... 

 Ooohhh- Atlantean battle armor?  I love it when, like; Wonder Woman armors up- I can't wait to see how awesome this will look!


 Why would Nova be thinking dirty thoughts about Speedball?  Nova's new costume "makes the man" because he calls Speedball by a lame nickname??  What exactly is Speedball  insinuating he did to get there first???  -Because absolutely nothing unusual happened.
What's up with that sly smirk?  Are they gonna fuck?  I'm so confused by this entire exchange.  -Come on Fabian Nicieza...

Wait... THAT'S the Atlantean battle armor??????
No, no, no- that's awful!  It looks like Gozer the Gozerian fucked something Jim Valentino created at Image back in the day...
-Come on Mark Bagly. Come on...

-Bring back that bikini!:


 "Hey, Pretty Persuasions- I want you to rape us- but no one is allowed to curse when Kid-Nova is around!  -ONLY NOVA MAY CURSE!"

 Ninja-kick the damn rabbit!!!


And then, at the end of the book, pure fucking awesomeness happens:

Right-click/View Image to embiggen!


I picked on a few things, but seriously- this is a great example of a perfect early 90's comic book.  And it holds up, man... SUCH a fun read! 

Leave a comment below, and I'll see you next time...


  1. Not bad issue, but very dated for the time. Good points about that weird almost sexual innuendo between Nova and Speedball. Was that ever followed up on?

    I prefer the bikini too, and definitely not the blue skin, on her at least.

    Balls to you!!!
    (You need to check out Liza Minnelli saying that weird-ass remark in an interview. Should be on youtube.

    1. I love dated, though! Dated is right in my nostalgia-wheelhouse!!!
      Yes, it WAS followed up on... in my dreams. Er, I mean- nightmares! My nightmares... *cough*

      I did not mind the blue-skinned version... I was not partial to it, but it's wayyy better than that armor!!! She's one of those cases where I think, as a Rule 63 Namor; she should also be wearing as little as possible. -Because it's fair.

      You watch Last Comic Standing? "Tell it to MY BALLS!!!"

  2. Imma need the Namorita pic for research purposes

    Also why couldnt spidey (the original not the clones) be on this team instead of the Avengers in Brian Bendis run he always came off as trying to hard and being annoying instead of funny and witty and you got like 5 superman level heroes on the team but the new warriors or the secret avengers i think he would be perfect in

    1. Yes, yes... "for research"- of course! Fictional Female Atlantean Anatomy? ...please. The ol' FFAA(p).

      I liked Ben Reilly (and now Kaine) in The New Warriors. But you're right- Spider-Man is a better fit with them over The Avengers... The FF did not even want Spidey! (Wayyy back in the day- I guess he has kind of been in it since then... but still not really.)
      I think he COULD make an interesting fish-out-of-water character/story as an Avenger in better hands than that fucking hack Bendis, though.

    2. i actually like Kaine more than Ben both are cool but but with ben to me its like Peter with blonde hair while you wouldnt even know he was Peters clone unless he told you

      To me the only problem i have with Bendis comics is that some of his stories take to long and whole lotta nothing happens for example I love Ult Spidey (the new one) great characters and dialouge is good to but damn there is alot of talking and not enough punching or webslinging

    3. I agree- Kaine is a way better Scarlet-Spider than Ben was!

      The only problem I have with The Bendis is that he can't write dialogue for shit.

      I don't fuck with The Ultimate Universe. It was The Nu52 before The Nu52.
      I'll never forget reading a description for Ultimate Spider-Man #1 in Wizard back in the day where Bendis was trying to justify another updated Spider-Man origin story and the one quote was along the lines of: 'Now when Aunt May worries about Peter- she can check up with him ON HIS CELL-PHONE! And Peter can do internet searches to help him figure out what's going on- it's very modern and familiar to newer readers!' ...and I threw up in my mouth.
      Plus there was that whole: These aren't your Dad's Marvel characters: THEY'RE EXTREME! Look; some of The X-Men have piercings, and tattoos- and Cyclops has a soul-patch! Can you believe it???
      And for some reason people liked it- at the time I gave it six months, tops...
      Then, later on- they overhauled it to just be all violence and gore. Again: The Nu52 before The New52... but at least they had the decency to keep that shit out of the main universe so everyone could enjoy the version they wanted.
      I hear good things about Miles Morales, though... I like the concept- it's just too bad it could not have happened in The 616. The Ultimate Universe is just so tainted for me.

  3. i'm probably gonna get some shit for this but here goes anyways. aside from a hand full of issues that have direct continuity tie-ins to the ROM series i've just never been that impressed with any New Warriors issues i've read. yes indeed they had some good things going for them such as Mark Bagley's art, Nova, Turbo, Namorita, Marvel Boy and some snappy dialogue. i certainly don't fault anyone for liking the title but for me it just seems to fall flat whenever i've read an issue with exception to the Rom tie-ins.
    now today i visited this comic shop i had never been too that i heard had a massive discount back issue selection, and it did! as a result of your posting i thumbed through a copy of NW #16 that i found there and then i realized that i had picked up #17 from another discount box at a comic shop elsewhere last year. #17 had The FF, Nova, Terrax and Silver Surfer and awesomely rendered by Bagley but i ended up passing it off to someone else at some point. i even had scanned in this one splash page that Dan posted on his blog http://www.itsadansworld.net/2013/05/now-thats-splash-page-silver-surfer.html

    however, part of my haul from today's comic shop visit was NOVA #3 (vol.2) 1999. i've had issues 1 and 2 for years now and i absolutely love em and i'm really stoked to have found #3 for a measly 50 cents i can't wait to read it.

    1. You son of a bitch! *throws shit at you*
      Hahaha- so the issues that are in any way related to ROM are good- but the rest are not? -Even though they have the same writers, artists, and characters in them... Makes sense to me. I detect no bias at all!
      That's cool, it's not your bag- I can dig it. New Warriors is definitely a "teen" book. And I was one when I started reading it, so... I've always liked it. But then again; Runaways, and Avengers Arena were "teen" books too- and I still enjoyed them greatly as an adult. So... to each their own.
      Yeah, I have #16 and #17 but never had this one and was still super surprised by the ending! I geeked out. Terrax The Tamer is the shit! And that Surfer-splash you're talking about was an awesome moment, indeed!
      Gotta love those fifty-cent back-issue finds, right?! Nova (vol 2) was a fun run- that's the one where Rich has his pottiest of mouths... #3 is with Spidey, I think?
      Good stuff.

    2. the NW issues I was referring to specifically are 60,73,74 and 75. I have no idea who wrote them off hand but the art was not by Bagley and I have no problem admitting to my bias seeing as those issues did some justice to the ROM continuity unlike just about everything else marvel has published in the last few years.
      as for Nova, there's no Spiderman in that issue but it does have the New Warriors and Fantastic Four in it for a bit. I sent you some clip art from issue#1 a while back where Rich is talking about hopefully seeing some Nova collectibles turning up some day. the three issues I have are great they have so much cool shit in them. Namorita gets pissed at Rich and starts fucken his friends while at the same time he's pinning away for this ex of his that's married to an abusive husband Rich as Nova puts in the hospital at the end of issue 2 after he tries to kill her. oh yeah, it gets better on the last page she tells Rich that she's pregnant. along with plenty of guest appearances from other marvel characters, some snappy dialogue and even a Rom #24 foot note those first 3 issues make for some of the best discount back issue finds I've ever made. I hope finding #4 some day doesn't take as long as it did to come across issue #3. i stumbled across issues 1 and 2 like fucken 7 years ago. i found some other good stuff at that shop yesterday too i talked a about them a bit at both of the blogs.

    3. Evan Skolnick/Patrick Zircher... Yeah- those are some great issues. I was not reading The New Warriors for a few years before those- they got be buying the book again!

      I don't think that's vol. 2 then, vol. 2 #3 has Spider-Man in it. I talked about vol. 2 #1 here: http://littlethingsincomics.blogspot.com/2014/01/eyepuke.html
      Oh, you're talking about the Erik Larsen issues!!! Oh, hell yeah- those were the best! That is vol. 3... a shame it only lasted seven issues. Marvel was giving him a lot of shit for what he was doing in that book. They were REALLY stifling creativity in 1999/2000 over there at Marvel. -Lot of problems going on at the time.

    4. yep, the Erik Larsen issues. it seems Larsen is a better writer then artist. not that I think he sucks he's just never been one of the better ones out there to me. still though, I would have preferred Larsen to Ditko on Rom or anything else in the 80s and 90s that Ditko did.

  4. I do loves me some classic New Warriors - and this ish was great for me because it was still in the days where Sil did something. That clock of pretty persuasions was awesome. I recently gave Karl a shite load of New Warriors reading to hunt out, as he hadn't realised how much the FF (his favs) starred in the original run. Terrax alone guest starred more than Ghost Rider - and it was the 90's!

    The line that wins from the issue "Maybe I should hit you one more time anyway"

    1. Yeah- Nova is such a scamp!

      One of the best comics-series of the time for sure, and totally underrated. I saw you mention on your site that you're not really that into the new run? -I love it!!! It makes me laugh, and there are audible "OH SHIT!" moments... I'm just happy they are back... also; Speedball!

      Pretty Persuasions should come back in Original Sin! I mean- if they're gonna keep pulling such obscure characters for that event, why the fuck not?