Good.
Everyone fucking loves Star Wars!
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| -Those boots!!! So ridiculously awesome! |
-This is Entity Comics' 1997 one-shot parody of the Star Wars films (written and illustrated by Bill Maus), made just to take a few digs at the (then) current theatrically re-released / CGI-added versions of the movies; or really just the concept of them... I guess? I'm actually not sure what the point / reasoning was for this comic having been made. $$$
Our comic begins with that old familiar crawl:
...
..."Fart Wars"?
-FART WARS?!?
FUCKING FART WARS!?!?!?
*sigh* Okay...
I'm going to start with the "best" "joke" in the entire comic, are you ready? -Your mileage may very, but this is going to set the bar:
That's as good as it gets, people.
You either mildly giggled to yourself, or you must have involuntarily groaned so loud it covered up your uncontrollable laughter. Either way; it's all downhill from here...
Bill Maus is great, I love what he did with Zen, I've talked about Nira X plenty before... I'm a fan of his art... but this comic is just... awful and stupid.
Maybe that's the point? It's like it's trying for, but isn't quite MAD Magazine quality humor... fuck, it's not even Cracked quality!:
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| Yeah! "And you better be a fucking ball in the soft-reboot eighteen years later so it will make better sense!" |
Sunglasses on C-3PO? THOSE DON'T BELONG THERE!
-INSTANT COMIC GOLD!
HAHAHA! -TOILET PAPER!!!
IT'S FUNNY!
YOU USE TOILET PAPER IN BATHROOMS TO WIPE OFF POOP... FROM YOUR BUTT! HAHAHA!
POOP!
TOILETS!!
BUTTS!!!
AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! FART WARS! AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
...is that?
-Is that Mr. Gone from The Maxx? ......what the fuck???
There and (forgive the pun) gone, no reference, no reason... what's the joke?
-Is that the joke???
And we're nine pages in before we get the issue's first appearance of Nira X- who is just randomly in a panel with no setup whatsoever... Not even sure where she is supposed to be in relation to everyone else on the page?
And yes, that's Darth Vader- oh, I'm sorry: Roll Vader, because comedy? -Get it? Like a ROLL of TOILET PAPER! AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! -FARTING!
I need a break from all this laughter. -Here's a nice little (I mean; now super offensive and degrading and should be banned and erased from all history ever!) Slave Leia pin-up...
Like I said; I like Bill Maus' art a lot. But it's like he wrote this thing in 5 minutes, drunk, on the toilet, on a dare...
So, then The Savage Dragon (with a tiny baby head) shows up for no reason, and is not seen again after this page/panel. And Bert from Sesame Street is there with a gun...playing Twister... because...... hilarious?
-There are Family Guy set-ups to cut-away jokes that make more sense than the shit that keeps happening in this comic!!!
The alternate cover I always had (pictured at the top) has an alternate-title for the comic itself, and Nira X on it. So I never knew the actual comic was really called *shudder* Fart Wars. And I, naturally, assumed Nira X was going to feature prominently within. -With this above panel you have now seen the entirety of Nira X in this comic. I remember being so pissed off I spent $2.75 for this back then! This also features Entity Comics' character The Skunk (another Bill Maus creation) whose books I've never read or owned... It had six issues and an annual in 1996, and that's about all I know.
Here are the other covers; just for posterity's sake...
Special Edition Cover: Return of the One-Eye Cover:
Then, finally, it ends:
AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! -POOP!!!
SOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!
POOP AND POOPING AND FARTS AND BUTTS AND TOILET PAPER AND POOP!
AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
I can not overstate how frustratingly bad this thing is... Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me! I fucking DARE YOU!
I will give it this, though... The last page here:
...is just as relevant to Star Wars today as it was then. Now that IS actually pretty funny!
...but they didn't mean for it to be.
There is also a back-up feature called "Star Snores" featuring the Adolescent Radioactive Blackbelt Hamsters... it sucks.
Why does this comic exist?
Did George Lucas read it and think it was hilarious?
-Was Jar-Jar Binks the walking embodiment of this comic book???
Did George Lucas read it and think it was hilarious?
-Was Jar-Jar Binks the walking embodiment of this comic book???
I think my brain is broken.
Ahhh Bill Maus....haven's seen his art in a dog's age. Used to fap to Nira X and some of his other erotic art back in the day. What....you know you did too...sinner;)
ReplyDeleteFart Wars eh? It just screams like the sort of things that's remotely funny for around say 5th-8th graders, but definitely not now or then. Topical though.
He's still rocking it, too. His art is better than ever some eighteen years since this comic... I'm tempted to save up- commission something from him.
DeleteNope, that's just you fappin' it. I bought Nira "The half naked cyber chick with big guns" X comics because of research purposes.
...yeah, those stories do not hold up. But back then- I thought they were so cool!
Fucking FART WARS. Yeah, you might have the age-group right... but for the late 90's only, I can't see this getting a laugh at all from any 8th graders within the past decade.
as far as published stuff goes both MAD and Cracked magazine over the years did some really good Star Wars parodies i still wish i had those issues. but the first Star Wars parody i can ever remember seeing was Hardware Wars back in 1980 at some kind of YMCA kinda day care center. they played it for us with one of those old school movie projectors like the kind teachers in high school used to use to show educational videos to their classes. but ofcourse these days you can find it on youtube like most anything else https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGDdFuDwTZ8
ReplyDeleteMAD and Cracked never really did it for me. I would always pick up issues if something science-fiction or comic-book related was on the cover back in the mid 90's... And I always remember being disinterested in a majority of the content. Just the style of humor, I guess. -Not for me.
DeleteWizard always cracked me up, though!
And I remember the time in, like, 7th grade- a friend and I came across an entire box of 80's Nation Lampoon magazines someone had put out to the curb for garbage day. We took/divided them fuckers up, man- they were awesome!
I remember renting Hardware Wars all the time from the video store when I was a kid. Had Bambi Meets Godzilla on it too.
I saw it again, many years ago, when they did a "Special Edition!" and I remember thinking: 'I loved watching THIS?' "Ham Salad"??? Ugh...
the skunk is basically a comic series about a muscular superhero who has powerful flatulence powers.he also has a female sidekick named Macy which he saved from a gang of thugs. the series itself goes between the line of the tick and the maxx. thats pretty much the basic of the series from my prospective from what i have seen in the descriptions.
ReplyDeleteAlright, cool cool cool... Thanks for stopping by, and thanks for the info!
Delete-Flatulence powers... *sigh* Yeah, he fits right in with this form of "comedy" then.
Ahhh, The Tick, and The Maxx... two truly awesome books I'd rather be reading now than thinking about this one.
I sincerely hope that Ive gotten better at this by now--(wow, this was bad...BUT the review of it was actually pretty damn funny and I feel your pain! --if anything good came out of this issue, it's by far, the review. It was like therapy...and I think I actually feel better after having read it) --by the way, I think I did draw and partially write this in 5 minutes--might have been less...the letterer back then was actually rewriting most of what I had down to be more...amazing. ( This was a group effort to pay the bills. Im sure we can all relate)--I don't think I was in charge of the actual 'idea' of doing this and I certainly didn't title it. lol--although I take full credit for how bad this is! I may or may not have been drunk and on the toilet when this all happened...but it feels like a dare, I have to agree:) For a lot of my early work, it's pretty obvious that I was getting paid to practice. --I still AM for some things...Im not sure why, but I keep getting work in precisely what I tell people I don't do well...is that my niche? I don't draw portraits...so guess what Im doing THIS week? sonofabitch--you guessed it. BUT, overall, I love what I do--Im getting better at it and there are some things that Im very comfortable with nowadays...but I never want to do work again that rapes your eyes the way that THIS book did. So please forgive me-- unless Im broke and I was forced against my will...then just feel bad for me and hope that I get better gigs.
ReplyDelete